Friday, December 2, 2011

True Friends

As I was sitting here procrastinating on studying (feels like college.. except it's not), I started thinking about what being a true friend is.  In the past year or so I had a person who I had considered a very close friend for a long time just stop talking to me.  She never told me why, and I'm not sure why because as far as I'm aware, I don't think I ever did anything to her (some of you probably know what I'm talking about right now), but it made me think... What is a true friend?  Here are my thoughts.  

A true friend is someone who has seen you at your best and your worst, but they are still there for you.  I'm not talking about taking abuse from you because nobody deserves to be treated like crap - there's a difference between being a friend and a doormat.  No, a true friend has seen you on your bad days, and maybe has had to deal with you when you're feeling irritable, but ultimately knows who you are, and is willing to deal with a few bad days because that friend knows you'll always be there for them during their bad days.  They watch you grow and change and are still there for you to help support you.  A good test of a true friend?  If you can live with each other and remain good friends (hi, Vanessa!), or you end up being good friends BECAUSE you lived together (hi, Amber!)  You can have occasional arguments, but you can get over it because you know it's just that - an argument - and it happens sometimes.  

A true friend knows both the good and the ugly, and is okay with both.  The friend might give you advice or tell you that what you're doing isn't the smartest idea, and you might not even want to hear someone tell you what to do, but you know the advice is because he or she cares about you, not because he or she thinks that they are better than you.  There are some people who will give you advice just because they think they always know what's best, but a true friend does it because they really CARE about YOU.  

A true friend is someone who you can trust.  You know you can tell them secrets, and they won't go telling everyone else just so they have a good story.  

A true friend might not even be someone you speak to frequently.  I have a few of them from my high school days.  Even though we don't talk often, when we do talk, it's like we haven't spent something like ten years away from each other.  We can still tell each other things.  

A true friend is NOT someone who abandons you because they meet someone "better" or a significant other (this is the worst).  To sort of contradict that, a true friend will understand if you have your slip-ups, because after all, nobody is perfect.  They also won't only talk to you when they want something from you.  

I know this was a little cliche, but those are my thoughts on what a true friend is or is not.  I've been fortunate to meet quite a few people in my life who I consider true friends, and I'm so thankful for them!  

6 comments:

  1. Awww... I love you my true friend. Love, Vanessa

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  2. Love love love! I agree completely...lost a "true" friend of 7 years because I gave her advice and she took it as me being better than her when i really just cared about her health and future!!! But I know we've had our bad nights...however the good times outweigh all the bad by like 10000000000!!! :D and i miss you and the rest of the girlies more than you can imagine </3

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  3. plus when we met, we both were under tons and tons of stress...normally those circumstances would cause 2 complete strangers to either be annoyed by each other or too busy to get to know each other...instead, we bitched about the stress to each other and found comfort in our similiarties of annoyances and getting screwed over by others during our detail hahaha great times!! Made the detail so much better than what it initally was...it was actually, dare i say it, FUN.

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  4. Awww, see, this is why you girls are definitely some great friends :)

    Amber, you are right. It's not easy to make new friends in those type of situations! You got to deal with me post-breakup with little sleep and a crappy job, and I know you were going through a LOT too (more so than me I would say!)

    Ah I miss everyone! Hopefully Rina's grad can be a mini-reunion :)

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  5. Aww, miss you so much Nina!! Y'all better drink a particularly fruity (and preferably pink) cocktail for me at Rina's graduation since I'll still be pathetically detained at FLW...

    PS: LOVE YOU!!!

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